LPC 13 Medley
(Ring) Entercom Denver, this is Robin. Yeah, Denise please. Who, I'm sorry? (Lowered pitch) Denise Plante. Plante...Oh she's actually, no... (LPC lowered pitch sound effects) Ohhhhhh Yeah. Hello? Yeah. I'm sorry, something really weird just happened with the phone, umm... (Very echoey) What? (wha, wha, wha, wha). Is she there, please? She's actually no longer with us. Oh, she passed away? Oh my god. No, no, no, no. She's just no longer with Entercom. (LPC echoey effects) Are you accepting donations? Or flowers? She's just no longer with Entercom. (Very strange Sound effects) Oh, oh,oh,oh. That's terrible. I didn't know. (LPC SFX persist through whole next line) She's no longer with Entercom. She hasn't passed away. She, she's alive. Hello? Well, she'll always be in my memory, sure. (SFX). Sir. She is no longer, she's just no longer with Entercom. (LPC sound effects) Ok, so what, can I drop off some flowers? Ok, this is freaking me out. What? There's something going on with like your line, or the phone, and it's making very weird noises. I'm very upset. I'm sorry, I don't mean to be unprofessional. No, no, no. (interrupted by LPC sound effects) She's (LPC sound effects) I can't even talk, this is so weird. I can barely compose myself here. No, sir, she's (LPC sound effects) she's (LPC sound effects) what is going on? I'm upset. Could you please try calling back? I'm trying to explain something to you. Go ahead, I'm listening, I'm just distraught. She's...no,no,no, sir, listen please. (LPC sound effects) She's...oh my gosh, what is going on? I didn't know. Ma'am I didn't know, this is the first I've heard of it. (sound effects). I can't understand what happened, I just saw her on television... No, she's not. ...you know? No, she's not. (LPC sound effects) she's...Sir, she's alive. She's alive. Sir, she's just no longer working at Entercom. She'll always be part of, yeah, she'll always be part of Colorado... No, she's no longer working at Entercom, sir. That's all I meant by that. (LPC sound effects) I can bring up flowers. I gotta tell my nephew. I gotta tell my brother. (LPC sound effects). Sir, (LPC sound effects) My goodness, what is going on? It's, it's not good. It's not a good way to start the week. (LPC sound effects). What is going on? (LPC sound effects) Hello, sir? What do you suggest? I mean what do you recommend? (LPC sound effects) I'm trying to explain to you, can you hear me? (LPC sound effects) Can you hear me right now? (LPC sound effects) Yeah, of course I can. Of course I can. Denise Plante is not working at Entercom. (LPC sound effects) It doesn't mean that she's not alive. (LPC sound effects) Ohhhhhhh noooooooo. Well, I guess I could put together a fruit basket. I could... No... (hang up sound) - INCOMPLETE TRANSCRIPTION: 2:20 - 3:15 of this track has not yet been transcribed. - (Ring) Service Department. My name's Bud Studdard, I'm a customer. Ok, ok what can I do for you? Yeah, I got some wipers up there, guy, last week. And uh, my car is messed up as a result. I got some big problems up 'ere. You guys warranty your work? I really don't understand what you're trying to say. (Sound effects) Oh, I got some windshield wipers, and then I left the place, and then I pulled a PIT maneuver at the dump, later in the day. And my car is fouled up (pitch shift) something fierce. I can't even believe it. I can't see anything. Ohhhhh(sound effects). Yeah, well maybe if you get your head out of your ass, you might be able to see it. Huh? You guys don't warranty your work up 'ere? Well, you didn't get any fucking shit from me, pal. What are you trying to say? I got my receipt somewhere around here. And you got a pair of wiper blades from me? (Sound effects) Yes i did. Are you a faggot boy? Are you a little fucking faggot boy? Your work ain't done right. I can guarantee you that nothing was done right. I can guarantee you're a little faggot. You probably suck dick, don't you? I went to the dump, and I pulled a PIT maneuver, and now I got odors coming out. My differential is (sound effect) fouled up. And I don't know what I need to do. Ohhhhh. (sound effects). You really need to take your money and buy something that's worth a fuck, 'cause you're a fucking idiot. Why don't you give me a refund? And then I'll... Why don't you come over here and try to get a refund? If you think you're that big of a fucking boy, why don't you come up here? Because I think you're a pussy. I'll come up 'ere and succeed. Is what I intend to do. Bring all your little fucking boys, and come up and do it. (Sound effects). (Hang up sound). - (Ring) Is this little boy again? You look like it. Hey, my differential's fouled up, guy. Yeah, your fuckin' brain's fouled up, too. You guys snortin' smoke up 'ere? 'Cause I don't know (pitch shift) what you're talkin' about. (Laugh) That's cool. Huh?! I like- I like that. I want a refund, I need it (pitch shift) within the next 24 hours. Period, end of sentence. (Laugh) (Hang up sound) - (Ring) Service Department. Hey, yeah, you guys stand by your work up there? Y'know, I can't hear you. I'm saying, do you guys give warranties on your work? Y'know what, you sound like you've got a dick in your mouth. Okay, well, that's unprofessional. Strikingly unprofessional. Yeah, well, calling here five times in a fuckin' row and playin' games is not very professional, either. Hey, you gave me defective wipers there, tough guy, and I want a refund. Yeah, yeah. Go ahead. I got- I got a lot of people here listening, and it's kinda funny, because you know what? We recognize who you are. So why don't you continue? (Pitch shift, echo) Oh no. Have you ever pulled a PIT maneuver at the dump? By the way, you know what's also funny is your burner app - y'know, so you got these burner fuckin' phone numbers - is really fuckin' traceable. You're a fuckin' idiot. (Echo) What are you tryin' to say? You are so much of a fuckin' idiot. You think we can't trace where the fuckin' burner numbers are comin' from and then who's got that? Are you that fuckin' stupid? You think you just get a fuckin' app and get any fuckin' phone number you want - use any phone number you want - and it's not traceable? Y'know, the fuckin' sheriff's already been here and- and got everything, got all the fuckin' recordings, dude. (Pitch shift) Ooh, is that so? unintelligible Because I don't really care. I own this fuckin' company, and I own two other fuckin' companies, and y'know what? You're a piece of shit, and they're gonna fuckin' go after you for harassment. So you keep callin' here, 'cause I got all fuckin' day, and I got over twenty employees- (Pitch shift, echo) I'll do it. -sittin' here doin' the fuckin' work, makin' the money for me, while you little fuckin' faggot sailor boys are sittin' there. You think I don't know who this is, or what this is fuckin' from? Are you a fuckin' idiot? My differential's fouled up because of your technician, didn't do it right. unintelligible ...your fuckin' differential. (Hang up sound) - (Ring) Service Department. Mind if I use the toilet up 'ere, real quick? So you're a faggot?! Gonna hop on the toilet, and then I'll take off. (Pitch shift) Oh Are you in the toilet? You sound like you're in the toilet. I'm nearby, and, uh, I'd consider it a big favor. You must be a fuckin' weirdo, 'cause you can't even talk and make sense. (Pitch shift) What do you mean there? (Mocking LPC) Oh yeah, oh. (Pitch shift) What do you mean there? You got a dick in your mouth? (Pitch shift) I don't make sense to ya, or-? Buddy, lemme just use the toilet. Yeah, I heard you like sailor boys. I heard you like to be on a ship and- and get fucked in the ass with the sailor boys. Is that true? I just need to borrow your toilet. You don't need to be sarcastic. (Pitch shift) Skip the sarcasm. No, I'm bein' sarcastic 'cause you sound like a little fuckin' faggot boy. Sound like a little faggot boy from down South, there. Are you? (Pitch shift) Just skip the sarcasm there, guy. I got sarcasm all fuckin' day long. I'm a rich dude. That's what I get paid to do, is be fuckin' sarcastic. I'm gonna swing a bullwhip up 'ere. Why don't you come and do it if you think you can? Is that what sailors do, is they get on their little fuckin' boats 'cause they're little fuckin' faggots? (Pitch shift, echo) I'm gonna whoop ya in the ass! Real men become Marines or somethin' like that. Only faggots become sailors. You ain't gon' whip nothin'. Y'know, you think you're so fuckin' cool with your burner app, you're callin' these numbers.? It's so easy to fuckin' block you all the fuckin' time. You know what, every time, I just record this, and it's easy to find you. (Hang up sound) - (ring) Wholesale Icons (?) Yeah, I'm Camacho. And I'm looking to to sell, uh, a comic book. Ok. I've got the, uh, KISS comic book. The comic was printed with real LSD, so it's real valuable. Uhhh, I don't have a need for that. Well I didn't ask you if you needed it. You're gonna buy it for somebody else to buy. I don't want to buy it, that's what I'm saying. I thought this was a comic book store. It is, but that doesn't mean I'm gonna buy every comic book, and I don't need that one. Definitely need it, and I'm lookin' to get money on it, don't you understand that? I understand what you're saying, but I don't want to buy it. What's the trouble up 'ere? I said, I don't want the book. You need to sell it to somebody else. Yeah, but I don't have someone who wants it, so I don't want to buy it. You got all kinds of people looking for this thing. This thing was printed with LSD, fella. (echo sound effects). I don't want it. You gotta have it. I'm telling you right now. I don't want it though. I've got it, it's in mint condition, it's sealed. I mean I lick it, once or twice a year. Then I definitely don't want it. Why? (echo) You just said you licked it, that means it's not worth as much. Look, thing has got LSD in it. Yes, I know, and that's an illegal drug. So why would I want something here like that. KISS. Yeah, that's nice, I just don't want it. The demons of rock. The demons of rock. I, I know. And I'm telling you, I don't want that book. Why? (echo) Come on, you gotta (weird sound effects). I don't know what you're doing with your phone here. I don't want... ...Look, I'm gonna come up there, and I'm... No, don't bother, I'm not gonna buy it. This is KISS. I don't care if it's KISS. I said I don't want it. From the 1970's. The demons of rock. I know what it is, I don't want it. I didn't ask if YOU wanted it... My store doesn't need it. You gotta have it in stock... I DON'T WANT IT! (echoey) You don't even know what you need, or have or what you don't have. You gotta get this thing in stock... And I don't want it. (Echoey) You've gotta know what you have before you get it... Listen, stop trying to sell it to me. I don't want it. You can call someone else, so... I'm gonna come up there, I'm... No, don't even bother coming up here, I don't want it. Just pay me what I need, and then... I don't need to pay anything, I don't want to buy it. KISS. (echoey) I don't care if it's KISS. Listen, don;t bother calling here again, I'm hanging up now. Listen, I'm gonna bring this comic book in there, and you're gonna love what you see. I guarantee it. Look, look, I don't want this book. Look, I'll let you lick the thing, and you can see for yourself. NO! I don't even want to do that. Look, just lick it, and then make your decision. NO! No, I'm gonna be calling the cops anyways, if you keep harassing me... I'm coming up there, I'm coming up there. Don't worry about it. I don't want it! It'll be fine. No, and I'm gonna call the cops and let them know all about this. Will you just lick the thing... NO! ...and tell me what you think? No, I don't want to lick it. I don't want to it. Come on, just check it out. NO! It's KISS, the demons of rock. Do you understand? (Sound effects until hang up) No! You're gonna love it, this thing is off the chain. (hang up sound) - (Phone ring and high pitched noises) Hello? This is Schwab, uh, you guys did some siding for me here pretty recently (Sound effects). Schwab? This siding is peeling off, and there is warping going on, and there's discoloration. This thing's funky. Real funky. (strange sound effects) Gimme just one second. You guys certified up 'ere? (Sound effects) Yes. (Sound effects) Certifiable maybe. 'Cause you guys are nuts if ya think... (Hang up sound) - ** Note - Incomplete transcription - Audio from 11:35 - end of track (15:00) has not yet been transcribed. *** Category:Medleys